みさご＠グレイ廃 - DO NOT REMOVE SOURCE. DO NOT REPOST ANYWHERE WITHOUT SOURCE.
I tried a 2-D printer once, and the paper jammed.
So now I just painstakingly re-create my paper copies by hand, like a medieval monk.
i tried using paper, but the edges crumpled
so now i just chisel my commandments into stone, like old testament god
I tried using stone, but it cracked and broke.
Now I just scream everything at passersby, hoping they’ll remember what I said so I can ask them about it when I need it.
I tried shouting things at passersby but they ignored me.
Now I emit allohormones in a gypsobelum that bonds selectively with the recipient’s hemolymph to reconfigure their bursa copulax into a copulatory canal. I can only say one thing, “I want to mate with you,” but really, what else ever needs to be said?
the #1 worst thing about tumblr, hands down, is seeing a personal post get tons of notes and then some stranger is in your face talking about how what you wrote about your own life doesn’t apply to them and how dare you imply xyz or whatever
like you can literally say “i personally have experienced this and this is me writing about my personal experiences” and a hundred notes later someone is calling you an asshole for erasing their experiences
This is so accurate. At school, we literally have children who will watch our facial expressions to see if them falling is as bad as they think it might be.
CORRECT CHILD INJURY PROCEDURE:
- do not react. at the most, maybe wince and go “ooooh”
- go over to the child to assess panic level and severity of injury
- if they’re like, dying, remain calm, but they’re probably not.
- look them in the eye and ask, “you okay?” they will nod. possibly all teary-eyed. then ask, “are we gonna need to cut it off?”
- the child is thrown off. if they giggle, you’re in the money. if they do not, put a bandaid on and do some sympathetic patting. they are probably a little teary. let the sad little bug sit out for a minute. they will quickly get bored.
- works every time
"sad little bug" is the cutest and most accurate term ive heard used to describe a child because sometimes bugs are kinda super cute sometimes bugs are really fucking annoying and sometimes bugs are downright TERRIFYING
They have to be bleeding for me to react. Otherwise, my students get the “you’re fine, let’s go back to fun music time” speech. I don’t even LOOK at the injury 99.99% of the time. Because kids are used to the overreaction of their parents and expect the same sympathy.
i laughed way too hard
-rouge to artificer using a custom golem creating device that uses the most abundant material in range. In a potato store house.